Hilariously imagined text conversations—the passive aggressive, the clever, and the strange—from classic and modern literary figures, from Scarlett O’Hara to Jessica Wakefield.
Mallory Ortberg, the co-creator of the cult-favorite website The Toast, presents this whimsical collection of hysterical text conversations from your favorite literary characters. Everyone knows that if Scarlett O’Hara had an unlimited text-and-data plan, she’d constantly try to tempt Ashley away from Melanie with suggestive messages. If Mr. Rochester could text Jane Eyre, his ardent missives would obviously be in all-caps. And Daisy Buchanan would not only text while driving, she’d text you to pick her up after she totaled her car. Based on the popular web-feature, Texts from Jane Eyre is a witty, irreverent mashup that brings the characters from your favorite books into the twenty-first century.
Ha ha ha.
Man.
This book is just so much fun. Author Mallory Ortberg has reimagined classics of all ages, from Medea and Gilgamesh to Harry Potter and The Hunger Games, and has put them together in a book that’s almost too great to read in one sitting (but I did it anyway).
From Circe defending certain poor choices she’s made:
… to Mrs. Bennet being very Mrs. Bennet-ish:
… this book captures the heart and soul of the stories it includes, and makes then just too damned hilarious.
What’s really amazing is that the author clearly knows her stuff, because she absolutely nails the key elements of the stories and the characters, the things that make them unique and recognizable. The texts are clever and so well done — I just couldn’t get enough.
Sure, some of the bits on certain classics went right over my head, since I don’t know the originals, but that didn’t take away any of the enjoyment. This will be one of those books to keep handy and just open up at random once in a while, especially when I need something to brighten up my day.
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The details:
Title: Texts From Jane Eyre
Authors: Mallory Ortberg
Publisher: Henry Holt and Co.
Publication date: November 4, 2014
Length: 226 pages
Genre: Humor
Source: Purchased
Bookshelf Fantasies 
This is the first time I’m hearing about this book, but it seems lovely I can’t wait to get it myself! Now I suddenly wanna brush up on my classics! ❤
It really is so much fun. I’m not putting it back on my shelf just yet — I keep picking it up, opening it at random, and reading snippets as I do other things.
What a clever book. I really appreciate the idea of texts capturing some of these books. I just need to check which books are covered to make sure I’ll get some of those references. 😊🙈
Great review! 😊
Even if you haven’t read a lot of them, I bet you’ll still find plenty to enjoy! I definitely did, despite the gaps in my reading history!
I’ve read some of these and they really are funny – glad you enjoyed the book!
Thanks – glad you did too!
This one really was so funny (even with my lack of knowledge on some of the classics too). The audio was great too!
Ooh, I didn’t even think about the audio! that might be fun to track down as well.