Title: 10 Things That Never Happened
Series: Material World, #2
Author: Alexis Hall
Publisher: Sourcebooks Casablanca
Publication date: October 17, 2023
Length: 432 pages
Genre: Contemporary romance
Source: Review copy courtesy of the publisher via NetGalley
Rating:
Fake amnesia. Real feelings? Real problems.
Sam Becker loves―or, okay, likes―his job. Sure, managing a bed and bath retailer isn’t exactly glamorous, but it’s good work and he gets on well with the band of misfits who keep the store running. He could see himself being content here for the long haul. Too bad, then, that the owner is an infuriating git.
Jonathan Forest should never have hired Sam. It was a sentimental decision, and Jonathan didn’t get where he is by following his heart. Determined to set things right, Jonathan orders Sam down to London for a difficult talk…only for a panicking Sam to trip, bump his head, and maybe accidentally imply he doesn’t remember anything?
Faking amnesia seemed like a good idea when Sam was afraid he was getting sacked, but now he has to deal with the reality of Jonathan’s guilt―as well as the unsettling fact that his surly boss might have a softer side to him. There’s an unexpected freedom in getting a second shot at a first impression…but as Sam and Jonathan grow closer, can Sam really bring himself to tell the truth, or will their future be built entirely on one impulsive lie?
Alexis Hall excels at FUNNY, and 10 Things proves it! I really enjoyed Boyfriend Material and Husband Material, and at the top of the reasons why is the quirky, hilarious voice the author gives the POV characters. 10 Things is not a direct sequel, but it inhabits an adjacent world (the Jonathan character here appears briefly as a wedding guest in one of the other books). No prior familiarity is needed — 10 Things is a quick, light read that’s very easy to get into.
Sam manages a branch of Splashes & Snuggles (and is the first to tell you what a horrible name that is) — a successful big-box retailer of bathroom and bedroom furnishings and supplies. One running gag is that Sam never fails to mention the full name of any product he refers to — a blanket is never just a blanket, but a Brentfords Super Ultra Soft Flannel Fleece. It’s kind of annoying and also totally hilarious when repeated enough times.
Sam’s management style leaves something to be desired, frankly. He’s exceptionally nice, which means he lets his employees take lots of time off, keeps on staff a walking disaster who regularly spills coffee on the most expensive display items, and (horrors!) routinely fails to upsell protection plans. When boss Jonathan (nicknamed by the staff His Royal Dickishness) summons him to the head office to discuss sales numbers and receive a sales coaching session, it’s a sign of impending doom.
After some awkward and unpleasant interactions, Jonathan fires Sam and makes it clear he intends to fire all of Sam’s team as well… but Sam, feeling intimidated, backs into a Nexa by MERLYN 8mm Sliding Door Enclosure (i.e., a shower) and ends up with a concussion. The concussion is accompanied by some initial confusion, so when Jonathan assumes it’s amnesia, Sam (making a really bad choice) decides to go along with it.
Granted, Sam has good intentions. By faking amnesia, he can pretend that he doesn’t remember being fired, and what kind of person would fire someone who just sustained a head injury in his own store? Sam has no one to take care of him, so naturally, Jonathan takes him back to his own home — a huge but sterile place — to give Sam time to recover. And as you’d expect, Sam gets to work on slowly but surely breaking through Jonathan’s icy demeanor.
To be clear, 10 Things is the grumpiest/sunshine-iest of grumpy/sunshine romances. Jonathan is presented as cold, mean, and uncaring (he didn’t get that nickname for no reason), and Sam really is a ball of sunshine. Sam is warm, funny, guided much more by kindness than by sense, and sets out to improve the lives of everyone around him, including (somewhat accidentally) inserting himself into Jonathan’s strained family relationships and forcing some Christmas cheer into Jonathan’s world.
The writing is super fun, including just wonderfully odd phrasing that made me laugh every time.
“Actually” — Anjad could hear a factual inaccuracy at eight hundred paces in a high wind — “that’s a misconception.”
“Is not.” Tiff is still pretty young, and she still goes to the is not/is too school of debate.
“Now how’d things go with Forest?”
“Badly.”
“Thanks. Very clarificationy.”
And if I was less pissed off at him than I am then I’d spend more time than I do reflecting on how much it must have sucked for him to live like that for, well, pretty much his whole life as far as I can tell. But I’m not less pissed off than I am, I’m exactly as pissed off as I am, so I mostly just feel sorry for myself.
“Besides, did you really think I go to sleep in a suit, so my pillows know who’s in charge?”
Right now, Bruno Mars is singing about how I’m amazing just the way I am, which is very sweet of him.
The plot itself is a little lightweight. I’m not sure I really understood the Sam/Jonathan relationship at its core — we’re shown how the two connect and how Sam gets past Jonathan’s iron exterior, but I’m not convinced that I believe it. It’s still very entertaining, but I never quite felt like I was reading about anything remotely real.
There’s backstory to both of their lives and current situations, and while we learn more about Jonathan’s upbringing early on, the reasons for Sam’s work and living arrangements aren’t explained until the very end of the book (95% according to my Kindle). That felt frustrating — it would have been helpful to understand Sam’s life from the start, rather than only knowing him through his actions as the story unfolds.
Still, despite the plot straining at times to make the case for why this couple should get together, it’s still a cute and very fun read. Did I buy Sam and Jonathan as a romantic pairing? Not really… but the overall story is so silly and the push/pull between the characters so entertaining that I had a really good time just going with the flow.
Bookshelf Fantasies 
Sometimes a fun story is enough, and I could see myself enjoying this too. The characters sound so cute😁
They’re adorable. This book doesn’t exactly require brain cells, but it is oodles of fun.